Useful Tips

How to become more adult in a relationship? How to become an adult and independent person?


  • September 23, 2018
  • Psychology of Personality
  • Elena Ilyina

How to become an adult? As soon as this question matures in a person’s head, it can be said with confidence that the process has begun. In the unripened children's brain, there simply is no place for such tasks. Another thing is that growing up can and should be helped. This will add to the development of awareness and protect against many mistakes.

It is incorrect to assume that the inner age of a person necessarily complies with data from birth documents. In this case, the question is reasonable: when does a person become an adult?

The stages and speed of formation are individual and depend on many factors, such as:

  • The psychological situation in the family.
  • Methods of education.
  • Social conditions.
  • Environment, etc.

But in most cases, at a certain stage, a person thinks: how to become an adult and is it worth it? Not everyone is ready to take on freedom. And with it the responsibility for your choice. In the case of a conscious exit from childhood, it is better to understand in advance what attributes of life actually refer to its adult part.

You should start with the fact that it is definitely not related to the reasonable actions of a serious person.

In an age of access to a wide range of information, a large part of the population continues to convince themselves and others that drinking is normal. All possible arguments are presented in favor of moderate consumption, instead of a complete ban. Sports stars are encouraged to switch to the use of drinks with a low ethanol content. The main political figures celebrate the achievement of important agreements with a glass of champagne. All this forms the image of alcohol in fragile minds, as an indispensable attribute of an adult and successful person. Few manage to analyze the situation with millions of shattered fates, proving that control in this area is the rarest exception. As a result, a deliberately destructive path is already at the very beginning of the life path.

The fashion for smoking, fortunately, is passing. But the previous generation is in the prime of life and authoritarianism. At the same time, it almost completely grew up in films about the Wild West. Cool cowboys smoked a lot in them, shot and smoked again. Having earned nicotine addiction almost at school, the majority carried the disease to the present day. Persuading their children not to smoke, parents continue to poison themselves before their eyes. And throwing into the fragile mind the idea that a cigarette is like an adult.

In this medicine, it is precisely known that the intake of nicotine into the body causes severe oxygen starvation and vasospasm. This affects the speed and quality of cell growth. It turns out that thinking about how to become an adult while taking a drag on a cigarette is a completely pointless pastime.

The early onset of sexual activity has not made anyone older, as evidenced by the huge percentage of harm to health. Abortion and sexually transmitted diseases. Broken fates of young parents and their unplanned children. All this has nothing to do with the question of how to become an adult. On the contrary, it confirms the immaturity of the person who decided on such a rash act. Inability to calculate the consequences is one of the main features characteristic of a young age.

It is permissible that the body is physiologically ready for sexual intercourse even before coming of age. But psychological development for this level of relationship is clearly not enough.

Girlish mistakes

Separately, it is worth highlighting the situation with how to become an adult girl. In a desire to appear older, young creatures of the fair half of humanity often try to behave defiantly. Bright makeup, emphasized sexy clothes, an abundance of perfumes and jewelry. All this will lead only to attacks from unbalanced and preoccupied personalities of the opposite sex.

It becomes obvious that neither bad habits nor early intimate relationships will help to become an adult. How to achieve this?

First of all, it is necessary to accept that this step is a natural stage of development. A turning point that must be experienced. A sufficient amount of useful information in combination with working on yourself will help to pass it with dignity.

How to become an adult character?

A person’s attitude to himself is crucial in how others will perceive him. Therefore, you should start with the inner world. His maturity and fullness. If thoughts are busy with computer games and correspondence on social networks, you can’t count on a serious attitude. Such people, even after thirty years, will receive scolding from parents and reprimands from spouses. And most importantly - take them as the norm.

Goal motivates development

It is always easier to achieve what you want if you know exactly what you want. It happens that the task seems too difficult to accomplish. For example, such as becoming an independent adult. Then it should be divided into intermediate (subgoals). To do this, you need to decide what traits in yourself need to be developed, and which time to get rid of.

Condemnation of another's labor

The less skills a person has, the more often he criticizes other people's achievements. Resentment from the realization that he himself is not capable of this causes a denial of other people's successes. A mature person will not waste energy on envy. Instead, a goal is set, and every effort is made to achieve it. At the same time, perseverance and perseverance are developed.

Hobbies - the path to self-esteem

Even tin soldiers can be a serious hobby. If an interest in something is manifested not in the form of random outbreaks, but as a stable activity, this causes recognition. The presence of constant interest indicates the maturity of the choice. And most importantly, it helps a person to know himself. See your strengths and weaknesses. Perhaps decide on a future profession.

Hobbies increase self-esteem and stimulate the production of hormones of joy. What is needed for an interested person, how to become an adult.

In conclusion, it remains to add that an adult is an independent person. He decides what to do and is responsible for the consequences of his choice. His actions are weighed. Ahead of them, a happy life and achievement of their goals await.

Form interests

How to become an adult and independent? We need to begin to develop the behavior of a mature person. We start by defining interests. The lack of movement and hobbies or other interests shows the immaturity of a person in general. It is good to choose a business from the many today's offers and, gradually developing it, become a pro. You can try yourself in photography, learn some musical instrument or even a foreign language. Or try yourself in acting or beatboxing? The main thing is that the chosen occupation should be liked, so that it does not become a burdensome duty.

This is the first application for growing up. The situation involves many advantages. For example, new topics will appear for conversations with people sharing this type of hobby, or new acquaintances. Any interesting activity increases self-esteem and develops imagination.

Another positive aspect of having a hobby, psychologists say, is the stimulation of the part of the brain that is responsible for positive and happy emotions.

It is good if the lesson will be active and useful in life.

Goal setting

How to become an adult? You need to learn how to set goals and achieve them. This is an important stage of growing up.

Attempts should be made to sort out your character. Identify your strengths and weaknesses. Explore propensities for various fields of knowledge. Choose the one with which you can go through life, reach the heights of mastery and get the maximum benefit, both mental and material. The goals set harmonize the personality, help to work on the character.

To set a life goal is not an easy task. But without this stage, there is no future. You need to start building the main idea from the categories: when, what, who, where, why and how.

  • When. This is a time frame. The date, of course, is difficult to determine, and pointless. But approximate time frames are necessary, this will help not to stray from the course and precisely go to the desired goal.
  • what. This is the fact of the desired. What exactly do you want to achieve. This item requires specifics. Streamlined options will not work. The goal should not be blurry. You can think of several smaller ones, certainly leading to the main one.
  • Who. These are reliable helpers and advisers. Both adults and peers who have already achieved something in life.
  • Where. The place, exact or in the broad sense of the word, in which the work on the goal will take place.
  • What for. This is almost the most important point. Upon reaching the goal, you need to see that the picture of life is taking shape, as it was intended. It is very important to understand the significance of the goal.
  • How. This is a step by step guide. You need to paint every step.

Setting priorities

How to grow up? You need to learn how to determine when seriousness is needed, and when you can fool around. After all, adulthood does not mean constant seriousness.

A mature man in actions, thoughts and actions knows how to feel the audience, to guess the mood of others. Consequently, it can be serious and fun at the right time. Ideally, it’s good to learn this in societies of various ranks.

It is equally important to take time every day for doing nothing. This is very important: letting yourself just laze around for a short period of time to let off steam and get rid of unnecessary emotions. But the main thing here is not to forget that you can’t categorically joke about weaknesses and look at another’s appearance and humiliate!

There is an important stage of growing up: the concept of the seriousness of the situation. At special events or in special places you need to not only be serious, but also pay attention to the events. This makes it clear to others that a person has matured.

How can I become an adult? Only respecting others. You need to live in peace with everyone and with yourself. If a person constantly annoys people around or close to him, what kind of rationality can we talk about? An adult always takes into account the desires and needs of loved ones and those around him. This behavior is worthy of him.

But this does not mean that you need to forget yourself and your desires. This means that you need to find a balance between your feelings and desires and the feelings and desires of others. And live in truth as old as the world: treat people the way you would like them to treat you. But rudeness and rudeness must be stopped. Just not meet and not communicate with such people.

How to grow up? Choosing friends right. They should make us better. And no other way. People who pull down must disappear from your life.

Very sensitive component of an adult. Arrogance and aggression show self-doubt. Both of these feelings harm others and, most importantly, the person who expresses them. If a person notices such moments behind him, experts advise talking to someone who is trustworthy (parents, close relatives or friends). Perhaps they will help to pay attention to these bursts and gradually reduce them to naught.

Adult, conscious behavior will not allow a person to fall to the level of gossip and rumor. It hurts a lot, even if the discussion has no malicious intent. Rumors can make a “cool” fifth grader, but not someone who thinks about how to grow up. Indeed, many dissolving rumors do not even think that they too can gossip.

You need to get rid of people who express a bad attitude towards a person. If the commented phrase or action does not cause another person to feel guilty and then apologize, then you must part with such a person without regret.

Adults are always open

This is not as scary as it seems. You just have to try - and, as they say, people will reach for you. For example, it is not necessary to condemn a person if his habits or beliefs differ from generally accepted ones. We must try to show interest in such an unusual life position. You also need to learn to speak less, listen more.

Nobody's perfect

How to become an adult in a relationship? First of all, one must not expect a dirty trick from people. We must accept that everyone makes mistakes (in fact, the same as you). This point of growing up is rather complicated, but taking it on faith will show others how mature the person has become.

How to become an adult girl? Simply simple: you need to gain self-confidence. For example, you do not need to apologize for your oddities or quirks, even if others do not approve of them. If such behavior does not humiliate or offend anyone, then you can safely express your life position in this way. An adult girl does not doubt herself and always in any society will be what she really is.

Well, of course, wondering how to become an adult, you need to learn how to be frank. And above all, alone with yourself. This is one of the important postulates of adult behavior.